Sunday, September 12, 2010

The Bleeding

So today my husband asks me why I'm so tired, to which I respond "None of your damn business get out of my face get me some cheese I need a nap DON'T TOUCH ME!!!!" It sounds mean because anyone that knows my husband knows he's ridiculously nice which makes me look even bitchier when I have these outbursts, which in turn makes me cry a lot because now not only am I a horrible person that belongs in an Afghan torture hut, but I also have a vagina that hates me and is leaking large quantities of my own life source from my body and making me retain more water than a hippo in heat. Though my sweet spouse is definitely adjusting to my radical behavior after living six years within hitting distance, I felt it might be helpful to draw some diagrams that might better illustrate the effects of the severe hormone roller coaster of hemorrhaging that is PMS:

BEFORE THE BLEEDING:



THE BLEEDING BEGINS:



I must have done a good job, because he didn't have any questions.

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